Finding Your Tribe: The 5 Friends You Need
We ain't in it alone. That's what DSM co-founder Courtney realized when she wrote her book. Her book. A singular piece of writing she did in the wee hours of the morning before anyone else was awake. The project she didn't need anyone else to green light. The thing that came from her, and only her.
Except, it didn't.
When you're pouring something like that out of your heart, it's easy to overlook the reason it's there in the first place. Your work is lodged in your chest, ready to be unearthed, partly because you're around a constellation of people urging you toward your calling.
Your tribe, a term coined by Seth Godin back in the day, attributes in a massive and a subtle way to how you create. The people around you push and pull. They instigate and listen. They refuse to let you settle when, had you been alone, you might have settled.
"Having people in your corner, who believe in you when you can't see the light, will help lead you directly to where you're trying to go."
The 5 Friends You Need in Your Tribe
1. The Spirit Animal: This is a friend who just gets you. You guys operate on the same wavelength, you start and finish each other's wild creative plans. You're not just in each other's corners, you're on the same path, with the same brain, hurdling forward together arm in arm. Spending time with your spirit animal gives you confidence, resources and clarity in your vision.
2. The Mm-Hmmer: When someone devises a space for you to ask and answer your own questions, you've found an important member of your tribe. You might come to them with anxiety-ridden questions, but they know you have the strength to figure it out. They don't judge, they don't fix, they don't direct. They give you courage through their loving non-answers. Their ability to see your strength allows you to see your own strength.
3. The Mirror: It takes a special person to be able to (lovingly) see the hidden parts of you. Your mirror is a friend who can see your strengths and your weaknesses. She knows your history. He understands your internal operations. Your mirror reflects the real you back to you. So when you start to go into the self-doubt-never-gonna-make-it spiral, your mirror can say, "Hold up. Look at the truth, silly." Your mirror teaches you how to have self-compassion.
4. The One Who Takes No Shit: This friend will not hear it. They call your bullshit. They dismiss your smallness. They see you as you are: an unstoppable force. This friend teaches you how to give up on excuses and get to work. It all comes from love and a settled belief that you are more powerful than you think. You get major mojo from this friend, so hold on tight.
5. The Mama: This could be your literal mama or not. The mama in your tribe is the one who hears what's going wrong and helps you muddle your way through it. This friend won't show you the path, but she'll show up on it with you for as long as you need. Generosity, kindness and a gentle hug all come from the mama. This friend helps you find endurance by way of love.